I was at dinner the other night with my BFF and her daughter when LLB interrupted us chatting adults by saying, "KAT! KAT!" Kat is the name of my BFF whom we were dining with. This was one of the first times that my daughter had shown an interest in talking to an adult. I interrupted her and told her to say "Ms. Kat", and then was surprised that I had done that.
I'm not one of those people who feels that all children should address adults as Mr., Mrs., or Ms. I'm all for showing respect and some formal conventions, but this isn't one I thought I subscribed to, until now. I'm torn -- I didn't like that she was interrupting our conversation and it felt odd having my three year old using an adult's first name. But I'm not sure I want her to have to address all adults as Mr. or Ms. I certainly don't want her friends calling me Ms. anything.
I'd love to hear what others do with this problem ... do you make your kids use formal titles? Do you even go one step further and do titles with last names, versus first names? I have friends who are very into formal titles and I feel it would be odd for her to have refer to some people with a title and not with others. Who'd have thought a three or two letter word could cause so much dilemma?
She Shoots, She Ms.-es,
Bronwyn
Showing posts with label toddler behavior. Show all posts
Showing posts with label toddler behavior. Show all posts
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Sunday, November 18, 2007
RAMBLING: Oh Happy Day
If you're the mom of a toddler you should appreciate this. My daughter is almost 2, and while she's a couple months shy of the title, the Terrible Twos have made some appearances in our lives. People remind me that she's still an excellent child. But of course I can't help but notice her behavioral tendencies.
She is testing me, pushing me to my limit ALWAYS! But not today. We had our weekly playdate at our house and I thought it would be a disaster. I was worried that she wouldn't want to share her toys with her friends. She behaved ... like a DREAM! Not once did I hear her raise her voice and when she did get a little cranky I reminded her that we were taking turns and she stopped and waited. STOPPED AND WAITED!
Nap time was more gloriousness, she went down easily. Stayed asleep for 2.5 hours and woke up in a GREAT mood. We were then off to Target to play with Lyssa and again she was excellent. I could go on, but seriously you get the point, even at dinner she sat quietly and BEHAVED.
I don't know who this child is, but she is welcome anytime. I think these moments come up just at the point with a toddler where you would send them away if you could, to remind you that they are lovable little creatures. I'm so proud of her tonight that I'm beaming and I swear my heart swelled a little more.
I'm sure tomorrow I'll pay the price, but hey I'll take what I can get at this point.
Basking in the Glow,
Bronwyn
She is testing me, pushing me to my limit ALWAYS! But not today. We had our weekly playdate at our house and I thought it would be a disaster. I was worried that she wouldn't want to share her toys with her friends. She behaved ... like a DREAM! Not once did I hear her raise her voice and when she did get a little cranky I reminded her that we were taking turns and she stopped and waited. STOPPED AND WAITED!
Nap time was more gloriousness, she went down easily. Stayed asleep for 2.5 hours and woke up in a GREAT mood. We were then off to Target to play with Lyssa and again she was excellent. I could go on, but seriously you get the point, even at dinner she sat quietly and BEHAVED.
I don't know who this child is, but she is welcome anytime. I think these moments come up just at the point with a toddler where you would send them away if you could, to remind you that they are lovable little creatures. I'm so proud of her tonight that I'm beaming and I swear my heart swelled a little more.
I'm sure tomorrow I'll pay the price, but hey I'll take what I can get at this point.
Basking in the Glow,
Bronwyn
Monday, October 22, 2007
RAMBLING: Terrible Twos Meet LLB
I've complained since she was 15 months that the Terrible Twos begin early. But I realized at about 18 months that her problem at 15 months was her communication. Suddenly around 17-18 months that fixed itself, she learned how to communicate a bit better about her needs and I was able to calm her down.
Now the LLB is 20 months old and it's a whole other story. She's looking down the barrel of the two year old gun and she's ready to explode. I try not to take it personally, I try to remember that some of her behavior may be my fault, but not ALL of it is. I try to remember that it's a phase and will pass.
Today she lost it for the first time in public. We were leaving the doctor's office, collarbone is healing nicely by the way, and the appointment time was 1pm. LLB naps from 12:30-3 so from the get go I knew we had an issue. Well she behaved very well for the appointment. I was shocked really. But upon leaving she got irate with me for trying to put her shirt back, what a mean mommy, I am!
She cried and even shouted a bit while we waited for them to make her follow-up appointment. She carried on in a way I've never seen her do and I had no choice but to stand there holding her. She hit me, tried to bite me, she was irate and I couldn't do ANYTHING about it. Finally we finished there and she nuzzled into my neck. The one position she can do that makes me forget what a monster she is!
I probably would have lost my cool with her had we not been in public. So I've done some asking around and found some good tips ... in hopes that I'm not the only one going through this, here they are:
Use Distraction: When your child starts getting worked up, try turning her energy and attention to a new, acceptable activity like playing a favorite tape or singing and dancing.
Stay Calm: A gentle tone of voice says you're in control. Sure, the calm, even-tempered approach may not be immediately rewarding, but you will see the effects as your child increasingly grows toward self-control. (This sounds hard!)
Place in Crib or Playpen: By placing your child in a crib or a playpen, you can remove some of your attention from their tantrum.
When in Public. If your child's behavior is embarrassing you, simply remove her without discussion or fuss. Then, wait until she's completely calm before continuing with your outing.
Don't Use Bribes: It only reinforces the negative behavior and ultimately teaches your child that if she wants something, all she has to do is scream and kick loud enough to get it.
Common Causes of Tantrums:
Frustration, Emotions, Control, Physical Hunger, exhaustion, over stimulation, boredom, not feeling well. Choices, too many or too few.
Welcome to My World,
Bronwyn
Now the LLB is 20 months old and it's a whole other story. She's looking down the barrel of the two year old gun and she's ready to explode. I try not to take it personally, I try to remember that some of her behavior may be my fault, but not ALL of it is. I try to remember that it's a phase and will pass.
Today she lost it for the first time in public. We were leaving the doctor's office, collarbone is healing nicely by the way, and the appointment time was 1pm. LLB naps from 12:30-3 so from the get go I knew we had an issue. Well she behaved very well for the appointment. I was shocked really. But upon leaving she got irate with me for trying to put her shirt back, what a mean mommy, I am!
She cried and even shouted a bit while we waited for them to make her follow-up appointment. She carried on in a way I've never seen her do and I had no choice but to stand there holding her. She hit me, tried to bite me, she was irate and I couldn't do ANYTHING about it. Finally we finished there and she nuzzled into my neck. The one position she can do that makes me forget what a monster she is!
I probably would have lost my cool with her had we not been in public. So I've done some asking around and found some good tips ... in hopes that I'm not the only one going through this, here they are:
Use Distraction: When your child starts getting worked up, try turning her energy and attention to a new, acceptable activity like playing a favorite tape or singing and dancing.
Stay Calm: A gentle tone of voice says you're in control. Sure, the calm, even-tempered approach may not be immediately rewarding, but you will see the effects as your child increasingly grows toward self-control. (This sounds hard!)
Place in Crib or Playpen: By placing your child in a crib or a playpen, you can remove some of your attention from their tantrum.
When in Public. If your child's behavior is embarrassing you, simply remove her without discussion or fuss. Then, wait until she's completely calm before continuing with your outing.
Don't Use Bribes: It only reinforces the negative behavior and ultimately teaches your child that if she wants something, all she has to do is scream and kick loud enough to get it.
Common Causes of Tantrums:
Frustration, Emotions, Control, Physical Hunger, exhaustion, over stimulation, boredom, not feeling well. Choices, too many or too few.
Welcome to My World,
Bronwyn
Friday, October 5, 2007
RAMBLING: Random Sleep Issues UPDATE
It would appear that the LLB is afraid of the dark even it's just a slight fear. She won't let you leave her in her room in darkness. But if the door is slightly open and she has a light on in her room (we have a three-setting light with a VERY dim setting) she does A-OK. I'm still trying to figure out what the deal is exactly, but it helps to have a slight fix to our problem so she can sleep.
On an interesting note she went down fine last night for the hubby ... I asked him what his trick was, he said he left the door ajar which is what I did tonight. But I still had to go back once and rub her back. Hmmm maybe Daddy really has the magic touch. I'm sure by the time I figure this one out she'll have a new "problem." :-P
To Sleep Perchance to Dream,
Bronwyn
On an interesting note she went down fine last night for the hubby ... I asked him what his trick was, he said he left the door ajar which is what I did tonight. But I still had to go back once and rub her back. Hmmm maybe Daddy really has the magic touch. I'm sure by the time I figure this one out she'll have a new "problem." :-P
To Sleep Perchance to Dream,
Bronwyn
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
RAMBLING: Random Sleep Issues
I've had it good. For about a year now Antonia has been an EXCELLENT sleeper, in fact I think it was around now that she started sleeping through the night last year. Regardless, even from day one I was blessed. She slept in her crib, yes her FULL crib and actually seemed to like it.
We've had a few hiccups in her sleep pattern when new teeth were coming or she was sick. But something new has come up and I'm a little confused. The usual routine is dinner, bath, pjs, read 2-3 books, drink some water and get in bed. She hugs me, kisses me and then waves me off after I tuck her in. Starting yesterday she won't say goodbye to me, I knew this was a bad sign.
I say goodbye to her anyway and leave the room, shutting the door. A couple minutes later she starts to cry :-\ then screams! Last night I took her out and cuddled her, tried to put her back and she clung to me. So I sat on the bed in her room with her and held her until she fell asleep. Tried to put her in again and she woke up and cried. So I spent more time waiting for her to drift asleep again. Total time spent trying to get her to sleep last night was 1.5 hours.
Tonight I noticed the same pattern beginning. No waving goodbye, cried when I left the room. I went in to her room and hugged her and gave her more water and then laid her back down. She let me lay her down but I couldn't even try to leave the room without her whimpering. So I stood there for approx 20 minutes.
Mind you I know this could be worse. She could be waking throughout the night, this pattern still allows me to get sleep. But I'm a little baffled about what could be wrong all of a sudden? She is napping fine at daycare. She has a nightlight on in her room, but it's not very bright could she be afraid of the dark already? Anyone had this happen? Could it just be an odd form of separation anxiety? HELP if you can.
What Happened to Sleeping Beauty,
Bronwyn
We've had a few hiccups in her sleep pattern when new teeth were coming or she was sick. But something new has come up and I'm a little confused. The usual routine is dinner, bath, pjs, read 2-3 books, drink some water and get in bed. She hugs me, kisses me and then waves me off after I tuck her in. Starting yesterday she won't say goodbye to me, I knew this was a bad sign.
I say goodbye to her anyway and leave the room, shutting the door. A couple minutes later she starts to cry :-\ then screams! Last night I took her out and cuddled her, tried to put her back and she clung to me. So I sat on the bed in her room with her and held her until she fell asleep. Tried to put her in again and she woke up and cried. So I spent more time waiting for her to drift asleep again. Total time spent trying to get her to sleep last night was 1.5 hours.
Tonight I noticed the same pattern beginning. No waving goodbye, cried when I left the room. I went in to her room and hugged her and gave her more water and then laid her back down. She let me lay her down but I couldn't even try to leave the room without her whimpering. So I stood there for approx 20 minutes.
Mind you I know this could be worse. She could be waking throughout the night, this pattern still allows me to get sleep. But I'm a little baffled about what could be wrong all of a sudden? She is napping fine at daycare. She has a nightlight on in her room, but it's not very bright could she be afraid of the dark already? Anyone had this happen? Could it just be an odd form of separation anxiety? HELP if you can.
What Happened to Sleeping Beauty,
Bronwyn
Saturday, September 29, 2007
RAMBLING: Toddlerwide Wrestling Federation
I posted this on my blog but I'm x-posting it here in hopes someone has some advice.
The LLB has a mean streak. It comes out every evening approximately 1 hour before bed. We have fun rough-housing and goofing around on the floor until she turns into a Gremlin. She smacks, bites, scratches, pulls hair ... I'm lucky I don't have scars, though I always have marks to prove it.
I like playing with her and I don't mind if it gets a little rough, BUT I can't take the outright abuse and I don't like that once she starts she won't stop. Telling her no doesn't seem to do it and punishing her breaks her down to tears and then she goes right back to the behavior.
Has anyone experienced this before? Does anyone have any tips? I've tried time outs, I've tried repeating some of the behaviors back to her without any force (ie LIGHTLY pinching her cheek when she's just pinched mine), I just don't have any more ideas left.
Victim of Parental Abuse,
Bronwyn
The LLB has a mean streak. It comes out every evening approximately 1 hour before bed. We have fun rough-housing and goofing around on the floor until she turns into a Gremlin. She smacks, bites, scratches, pulls hair ... I'm lucky I don't have scars, though I always have marks to prove it.
I like playing with her and I don't mind if it gets a little rough, BUT I can't take the outright abuse and I don't like that once she starts she won't stop. Telling her no doesn't seem to do it and punishing her breaks her down to tears and then she goes right back to the behavior.
Has anyone experienced this before? Does anyone have any tips? I've tried time outs, I've tried repeating some of the behaviors back to her without any force (ie LIGHTLY pinching her cheek when she's just pinched mine), I just don't have any more ideas left.
Victim of Parental Abuse,
Bronwyn
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